The Slanted Truth: Rationalizing Trash-Talk
When a parent talks trash about the other parent directly to the children, a common rationalization is, “My children deserve to know the truth.” You will observe that “the truth” in these situations...
View ArticleAnswering Critics – Part 1
The many parents I have helped, women and men, express astonishment that some people demonize me, attempt to tarnish my reputation, and spread misleading and false information about my work and me....
View ArticleAlec Baldwin’s A Promise to Ourselves
Alec Baldwin was kind enough to tell me how much my book, Divorce Poison: How To Protect Your Family From Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing, helped him understand his difficult family situation. I would...
View ArticleState of Plutoverse – 2010
This is the first of what I hope will be an annual column recapping significant professional events of the year. 2010 was unusual in the number of major milestones that occurred. I do not expect to...
View ArticleWhat Judges Need to Know in Parental Alienation Cases
The Complex Tapestry of Parent-Child Relations emphasizes that the psychology of alienated children cannot be reduced to a single factor. In some cases, the judge has little doubt that one parent is...
View ArticleWhen Kids Need To Know Bad Things About a Parent – Part 1
Like many rejected parents, Maureen bit her tongue when her children returned from their dad spewing venom about their mother’s alleged wrongdoings. She thought she was taking the high road. She had...
View ArticleTelling Kids Which Parent Wanted the Divorce
I have posted a few replies to comments on my recent Huffpost article. Learn more.
View ArticleWhen Kids Need to Know Bad Things About a Parent – Part 2
You are convinced that your child’s other parent, or a grandparent is bad, and the kids should know about it. Do they really need to hear what you have to say? When facing the impulse to present a...
View ArticleParental Alienation in Finland
State of Plutoverse – 2010 mentioned the upcoming Finnish translation of Divorce Poison. Today I received a note from a faculty member of the University of Helsinki that parental alienation is being...
View ArticleBad-mouthing a Parent Harms Children’s Self-esteem
In response to a comment on my recent Huffpost blogpost, I wrote the following. Children identify with both parents. Remember how you felt as a child when a playmate trashed-talked your parents? In my...
View ArticleKudos for Pluto
The American Journal of Family Therapy, a peer-review, refereed journal, has published a review of the DVD, Welcome Back, Pluto: Understanding, Preventing, and Overcoming Parental Alienation. The...
View ArticleWhen Kids Need to Know Bad Things About a Parent – Part 3
The Warshak Test helps parents judge whether their criticisms of each other are likely to help or hurt their children. The purpose of the test is to raise awareness of the impact of your words on your...
View ArticleParental Alienation Cited in Goldman Decision
Parental alienation is emotional abuse. Judge Guadagno is clear about this. Ruling last week in the Goldman case, the judge calls the behavior of the child’s stepfather and family “contemptible” for...
View ArticleChildren Don’t Always Say What They Need
When training judges about parental alienation cases I emphasize that a child’s stated wishes may be a poor index of the child’s best interests. Children do not always want what is best for them. What...
View ArticlePAX
Announcing a new category in Plutoverse: Parental Alienation Exchange or PAX. This is in response to a suggestion by a mother in Australia who would like to see a central registry where alienated...
View ArticleNH Supreme Court on Parental Alienation
In a stunning ruling, of interest to all those concerned with parental alienation, the Supreme Court of New Hampshire overturned a lower court’s award of custody to a mother who was found to be...
View ArticleWhy Did You and Daddy Get Divorced?
When parents decide to divorce they face the difficult challenge of telling the children. The task is so difficult that about one in four parents say nothing to the children. They leave the kids to...
View ArticleCritics Continue to Draw Attention to My Work
Once again I must thank my critics for doing such a good job of promoting my work. Their latest assistance came in the form of protest letters to the organization that invited me to deliver the keynote...
View ArticleWhat Divorced Parents Can Learn From Atlas Shrugged
Fifty-four years after publication, Ayn Rand’s magnum opus, Atlas Shrugged, has hit the big screen, opening to modest success by independent film standards. It is currently #6 on Amazon, and the...
View ArticleNY Higher Court Decision on Parental Alienation
MATTER OF BOND v. MacLEOD 2011 NY Slip Op 03153 509360.Appellate Division of the Supreme Court of New York, Third Department. Decided April 21, 2011. Based upon the expressed preferences of 13-year-old...
View ArticleMilestone: 100 Five-Star Reviews of Divorce Poison on Amazon!
As I mention in the Introduction to the revised edition of Divorce Poison, it has been so gratifying to hear from readers who find my work helpful in navigating a difficult passage in their life. I am...
View ArticleMother’s Day Message to Rejected Mothers
Mother’s Day is not a happy occasion for mothers whose children reject them. On this day your children should be honoring you and celebrating your contributions to their lives. Instead, their love for...
View ArticleExistence of Parental Alienation Is Now Beyond Debate
Survey results just released show near unanimous agreement among professionals that children can be manipulated by one parent to turn against the other parent. The survey was taken at the annual...
View ArticleDivorce Poison Makes LA Times Top 10 Books for Arnold and Maria
The LA Times has listed the top ten books for Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver. Divorce Poison is on the list. Read more.
View ArticleTime.com on Schwarzenegger Kids
Time.com interviewed me for an article on how children of celebrities cope with parental betrayal. Read the article.
View ArticleShriver & Schwarzenegger: What About the Kids?
People are wondering how the Shriver-Schwarzenegger split and his infidelity will affect their children. Coping with their parents’ separation is difficult enough for children. In this matter it is...
View ArticleParental Alienation Victim in Court: “I Lied About Abuse.”
When a child’s affection for a parent has been effectively poisoned, the result can range from sad and emotionally devastating to severe tragedy. Some cases of divorce poison leave a parent bereaved at...
View ArticleAlienated Children As Cat’s Paws
In The Monkey and the Cat, an Aesop fable put into verse by 17th century poet Jean de La Fontaine, Betrand the monkey induces Raton the cat to pull roasting chestnuts from the fire, by promising him a...
View ArticleFather’s Day Message to Rejected Fathers
I set out to write this message for rejected fathers and quickly realized that I wanted to tell them the same things I told rejected mothers on Mother’s Day. So here is the prior blogpost, intact,...
View ArticleDivorce Court: Mopping Up the Mess
Most people never have their day in court. They have no need. They commit no crimes. They avoid lawsuits. And they never testify at a trial. Most of us never even serve on a jury, despite being...
View ArticleCollege Helps Renew Parent-Child Ties
Some time during my first semester in the men’s dormitory at Cornell (in those days co-ed dorms were mere fantasies), the guys on the floor began talking about their parents. The more we talked, the...
View ArticleDivorce Poison (2nd ed) Now in iTunes and Kindle
The wait is over. Through some gap between my publisher and the Kindle folks, the downloadable edition of the revised edition of Divorce Poison never saw the light of digital day in 2010. Last April,...
View ArticleState of Plutoverse – 2011
In case you wondered, other projects have pushed my annual review of the year to the side for a couple of months. File this column under: better late than never. Pluto Transforms Lives Across Six...
View ArticleState of Plutoverse – 2012
2012 was both an interesting and personally difficult year for me. A serious illness in my family placed severe limitations on the time I could devote to my writing and research. As a result,...
View ArticleManaging Severe Cases of Parental Alienation
I am pleased to announce my new article: Managing Severe Cases of Parental Alienation. Published by the State Bar of Texas, it includes never-before-published material previously available only through...
View ArticleAlienated Trekkies: Star Trek Fans Who Hate (Or Are On Their Way To Hating)...
Resources for parents whose children are Star Trek fans and are alienated or at risk for becoming alienated from a parent. Stories, fairy tales, and fables are the age-old ways of communicating life’s...
View ArticleReaching Out to Young Adults After Years of Estrangement
A therapist’s advice column instructed alienated parents to take the type of proactive stance that I advocate in Divorce Poison to prevent and overcome parental alienation, and concluded by urging...
View ArticleTeaching Children to Hate
Two common divorce scenarios: You thought your marriage was on solid ground, until you discovered your spouse’s affair. You file for divorce, and blame the end of your marriage on your spouse’s...
View ArticleWhat Courts Can Do About Parental Alienation
Last February I was honored to be invited to Victoria, British Columbia to film segments as a guest on the leading talk show produced in Canada: Family Matters. The show is hosted by Justice Harvey...
View Article5 Ways to Keep Kids Happy This Season
While other children eagerly anticipate family celebrations and holiday gifts, those being raised by parents in two homes face the holiday season with some trepidation. Will the parents agree on the...
View ArticleDaddy, Tell Me A Bedtime Story
Mom instilled a love of music in me at an early age. When I was three years old, she gave me a small record player with a couple of small red plastic disks especially for kids, and a few 78 … Continue...
View ArticleTen Parental Alienation Fallacies
I am pleased to announce my new paper, published online earlier this month by the American Psychological Association (APA). Ten Parental Alienation Fallacies That Compromise Decisions in Court and in...
View ArticleUnderground Love
♪ Baby, baby/Where did our love go? ♪ One of the most disheartening and confounding aspects of parental alienation is the evaporation of your child’s lifelong love for you, sometimes in the blink of an...
View ArticleWaiting for a Child’s Return: False Hope or Realistic Possibility?
A comment to one of my Facebook posts expressed pessimism regarding reconciliation with estranged children: “How to deal with it? Say goodbye and move on with your life! You will never get your...
View ArticleHearing Children’s Voices
Children’s perspectives can enlighten decisions regarding custody and parenting plans, but different opinions exist about how best to involve children in the decision-making process. Payoffs and...
View ArticleMistakes Alienated Parents Make: 2. Counter-rejection
In the early stages of alienation some rejected parents counter-reject their children. They rebuke the children for their negative attitudes, and tell them, in effect, “Shape up or ship out.” They...
View ArticleUK Agency Denounces Parental Alienation As Child Abuse
Behavior by one divorced parent that attempts to undermine a child’s relationship with the other parent—what I call “divorce poison”—has been denounced as child abuse by the chief executive of the...
View Article“It really seems pretty obvious.” – BBC radio presenter on parental...
BBC’s award-winning radio commentator, Jane Garvey, talked to Sarah Parsons, Principal Social Worker at Cafcass, and to Joanna Abrahams, a solicitor who specializes in cases of parental alienation....
View ArticleMistakes Alienated Parents Make: 1. Losing Your Temper
Alienated children can be rude, obnoxious, and hateful. They express and provoke great hostility. It is understandable that the target of gross mistreatment feels like responding in kind. But losing...
View ArticleBacklash Against Parental Alienation: Denial and Skepticism About...
A boy wrote a letter to his mother telling her that she belonged in a mental institution, that she was nothing to him, that she was nothing but a screw-up, that she was sick, selfish, that he wanted to...
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